I have 99 followers. My cats say they'll clean their own litterboxes for a week if I can get to 100 before midnight. If I don't get to 100 by midnight, the cats say they will never eat dry food again. Please help me. #followme #WritingCommunity #PleaseRT #help

Thanks to everyone who followed me to ensure that my #cats start pulling their own weight around the house. But now that I have over 100 #followers they're saying they never said they'd clean out their own litter boxes. I guess they watched #MTG's testimony yesterday. #Caturday

Just remember: when a queer says "queer," it's satire. (I am a queer.) #Satire #shortstories #Theater #GoreVidal #Mothers citizenjim.substack.com/p/the-queer-an…

It's almost time to hate-watch #GentlemanJack. I'm the worst lesbian ever. #Socialism #AntiImperialism #AntiCapitalism

I wanted to do a tweet about the connection between self-loathing and writing but I was too stupid to come up with a good one, so I just gave up. #WritingCommunity

Could two followers please copy and re-post this tweet? I'm trying to demonstrate that someone is always there, especially at this time of year. Call 0800 689 5652 (National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK). Just two. Any two. Copy, not retweet. Let’s all look out for each other❤️

What is middle age? Hearing a song like "Somebody" by #DepecheMode, singing every word, remembering when you used to aspire to the lyrics before thinking, "What a bunch of fucking bullshit," then putting SPOON's new album on repeat for the rest of the night. #GenX

Throwback #Caturday: my yellow tomcat, Jay. Ca. April 2005, Buckhannon, WV.

#Substack #Ireland #WritingCommunity #shortstory #Satire #NorthernIreland #Caturday #FelineDiabetes #villanelle #GenerationX #GenX citizenjim.substack.com/p/20220430?r=2…

I know that the world doesn't care, and neither do any of my Twitter followers, but it must be said: I can't watch Suranne Jones overact and inhabit the flawed character of Anne Lister anymore. Life is too short to spend any more of it on #GentlemanJack. #BadLesbian

My whole life, I thought the guy on the cover of Standing on a Beach by the Cure was wearing a hat. Guess what? HE WAS NOT WEARING A HAT! God, midlife is going to kill me before all is said and done.

What a day. An election of a generation. Thank you for your support. We will work hard for everyone. #AE22

It's been AM, TLSP, and Alex all day for me. Arctic Monkeys @lastshadowpup #AlexTurner youtu.be/Z2q6oLZwl9o

I know I need to leave this country when I’m torn over whether Disney should be “punished.” I mean, they’ve destroyed our culture but this guy wants to destroy our Democracy.

Love the smell of vinegar? Come on over! Zelda knocked an entire bottle of it onto the brick floor of the kitchen at 5:30 am! Woooo hooo! Also: does anyone want an ill-behaved calico cat?

From Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga-era EP... (SPOON): spoontheband.bandcamp.com/track/draculas…

If you like bad #cats, #OscarWilde, #HermanMelville, #JodieComer, @JackPendarvis, and/or "The Young and the Restless," you NEED to read this story! Don't wait! Click the link, NOW! Then subscribe to read more FREE stories every week! citizenjim.substack.com/p/the-busted-v…

My assisted living residents and I made pickles today! Can’t wait to try them.

I’m sending this photo of a cheese and onion flavored Tayto crisp sandwich to Sinn Fein HQ. If Mary Lou McDonald doesn’t help me when I seek asylum after the 2024 election, I don’t know that I can keep buying things from the Sinn Fein bookshop. Anne-Marie M