the official sound of Murray Hill

This guy ghosted me 2 years ago. He also sent me this text 3 months after he ghosted. Happy International Women’s Day.

day 5 of isolation

what do Instagram quizzes know that we don’t

if a man tells a joke and it’s funny i’ll wait until i get home to laugh

after 40+ years my parents moved to NJ and got rid of a ton of stuff they didn’t need anymore. They held on to priceless and irreplaceable treasures like 200 individually wrapped beanie babies

How do I sue Larry David??

as soon as I saw the paywall went away I immediately looked for this incredible Kate Berlant line read

once again begging you to read this piece from katie before you reply with something insensitive basketballfeelings.substack.com/p/by-the-numbe…

it’s back baby!!!!

the original yassified her to maintain anonymity

when they interviewed that girl about sitting next to Lebron and the camera zoomed out to show he was there pretending he couldn’t hear her

choosing to believe that Kyrie is heavily invested in the Jonas brothers divorce drama

TODAY

never seen the Good Doctor so I’m pretending he gets asked this question by a different person each episode

Posting this for the 2 people who see my tweets: To get 'Espresso' out of your head, listen to 'Higher' by Creed at least 1x. Foolproof method. Not sure if it works for other songs, will report back.