sorry to feminists but i don’t wanna work anymore

taylor swift: sometimes i feel like everybody is a sexy baby jacob from twilight: aha oh word????

i hate being drunk and not having aux!!! what the hell is this shit that’s playing??? y’all hate me so bad

I may be a girl with huge tits, but first and foremost; I am a hater

Mommy can’t talk right now she’s liquidating her assets for the Eras Tour

What is Joe Biden’s plan to get Taylor Swift to fit 229 songs into a two hour set

the meal i’m eating is good but it’s missing something (being chicken tenders)

a nice cold dr. peppy in the morning to make the pain go away

i feel like the only way to enjoy someone’s instagram story is if you’re obsessed w them or you want them dead. otherwise it’s kinda just like ?????

every girl has had or has a sinister homosexual trying to ruin her life

people that own big dogs homes always smell a bit…corn chippy and zooish.

oomf (one of my faggots)

I don't speak Spanish, but I will top a tio.

excuse my language but: gayle from the hunger games is a selfish, bumbling, big headed bitch. there are more pressing things in her life than your jealousy. i wish they would’ve drew his name out that bowl.

taylor swift played clean when i wasn’t there so i blocked gracie abrams

Huge knockers

just saw the barbie movie and it’s fantastic! i won’t give away the entire ending, but she does kill osama bin laden