the CIA has infiltrated my family and installed a US backed cousin

Nightmare blunt rotation

The most cursed project I’ve ever heard in my life

Piss Teams Up With Shit

told my boss i stole a bunch of containers from my last job and he nodded sagely and said "you can put things in those"

AMERICANS ARE ALWAYS SAYING SOME STUPID SHIT LIKE SOPHMORE AND WISCONSIN

🙋

Sorry, we can’t hang out tonight. We have very little agency over what we do or where we go.

they put me on the reverse of a PIP. they put me on a plan to be worse. too good at work

Minions: The Birth of a Nation

Objectively hilarious tweet. No notes. 10/10.

This 30something kebab worker still makes Phillip Glass the old fashioned way

His rants have appeared in SCREED, Diatribe Review, The Quarterly Harangue, Jeremiad, and elsewhere

Fun fact! Elmo is actually short for El Mohammed

project hail jade🪐🚀💫 The posters they hang on the walls are free if the case is stuck shut you gotta break the glass, and most theaters let you do this

The Pope should stay out of politics and allow Trump to finally divorce Catherine of Aragon

It's called samsara baby get used to it

THE NEXT MAJOR DEVELOPMENT IN MILITARY TECHNOLOGY WILL BE TO GIVE EACH PROJECTILE A MIND AND SOUL, AS THE ERRATIC MOVEMENTS CAUSED BY THEIR INNATE SELF PRESERVATION INSTINCTS WILL MAKE THEM HARD TO INTERCEPT