FINANCE: For you "high rollers", ILB Officials have installed new ticket and peanut vending and receiving stations that allow you to transact at high volume. Spend wisely, fans! Spend like your favorite Blaseball player's life depends on it. It does. #blaseball

BREAKING: Fans are manipulating the Idols for nefarious ends once more. Fridays pitcher Sixpack Dogwalker has been positioned at #18, a spot marked by an ominous microphone. This, with Dogwalker's pregame ritual of "Talking to the Microphone" could have disasterous consequences.

BREAKING: It—whatever that may be—is complete.

We recently hosted a meet-and-greet of some top ILB players. Fans complained, saying the players were stand-offish and quiet, refusing to engage with anyone. Here is a photo from the event. #blaseball

Wait, there are games today?

ANNOUNCEMENT: We're going to be taking a break from Blaseball "news" coverage for the Season to focus on personal projects. In our absence, just make up stuff. Really, news is that easy. Feel free to tag us so we can still get our rumor fix. #blaseball

BREAKING: Something about coffee?