when you've already calculated how many hours you're going to sleep, but you can't fall asleep and the number keeps dropping

Hearing people say they've never called off work in 40 years, as someone who has called off to play outside

We cannot all be trying to head home at 5:00PM. We have to start going home in groups

You can tell black people the full plans and they’ll still say “okay just let me know.” NIGGA I JUST DID!!!

Yes SNAP recipients should be allowed to purchase hot food. What’s someone without a kitchen going to do with ingredients??? Food is FOOD.

job interviewer asked me if i have any questions and i pulled the “when can i start?” and everyone in the zoom call laughed

Is that a black girl falling?! She know damn well she shouldn’t have been up there with that WhyGurr!

Why don’t the young men wear dress shoes to prom anymore? 😭

My son is only 2 and i can’t even imagine what the kids gone be wearing to prom when he’s in high school. If your prom date wears heels, you WILL be wearing dress shoes. Some Stacy Adams if you ask me 😭

Bigger question, how the vampires gone come in the juke joint because SHE said so? Her name ain’t even on the lease.

I hate when you're looking for apartments to rent, you find one reasonably priced and then you realize they're Senior living apartments. I mean, I'm in bed by 9pm and I get up at 5am. I QUALIFY.

fuck Dascha

Leave a little privacy gap when you're next in line at the pharmacist.

Stay in In Colony House, then a fool decides to open the door at night just because they've been in a talking stage with one woman outside.😭

let that hot ass grease from the fryer hit that belly skin, promise you won't have an issue moving forward

this isn’t getting enough love for me

mf look like 50 Cent in that one movie nobody saw 😭

The ATM ask 25 questions... can you please HURRY UP before I get robbed

when you left the house in your idgaf outfit but now you out and gaf.