time and effort impresses me

the level of coldness and IDGAF i’ve reached this last year is insane

need: one of those hugs that quiets all your demons and helps heal all the things that are broken inside you

my only fans is just me doing laundry, cleaning house and cooking

Good luck finding someone to look at your butthole, man.

I wish I had just half the confidence of people who tweet all day long about how hot they are.

I have big boobs, they’re kinda noticeable no matter what and I generally don’t like shirts that are anywhere close to my neck because it’s uncomfortable for me. Totally not sorry if that’s a problem for you.

psst, she wants you to tell her that her butthole is pretty

i just blocked everyone i don’t have a crush on, so if you’re seeing this…hiiiiiiiiiiiii

as she stirs waking from her slumber i can’t help but think i could really go for her giving me a quick sloppy hummer ~this is now a poetry account

watching someone abandon you during a time you really need them will make you look at everybody differently

I remember when $200 could get you a trunk full of groceries. Now you can carry them to your car without any bags.

Good morning, weirdos Happy Friday

Is 9am too early to start drinking?

Her texting me: wanna come give me a hand in the shower 😈? Me texting back: why, is this the first time you’ve taken a shower? Her: …

if she’s shorter than 5’ 8”, you know she comes with an attitude

if you’re not teasing her so much she eventually starts begging you for it, then melts when you finally give it to her, you’re doing it wrong

Fuck your drugs, overdose on me.

constantly thinking you’re not good enough, because you’ve been made to feel that way, really messes you up and causes unimaginable pain