California Declares Math Racist After Budget Report Reveals Billions Missing americaisms.com/california-dec…

“If you screenshot it, you signed it,” writes Justice Kavanaugh in majority opinion written entirely in Comic Sans. americaisms.com/supreme-court-…

Millennials Discover Cash, Declare It “Retro-Chic” Alternative to Venmo americaisms.com/millennials-di…

BREAKING: New Global Virus Called ID-10T Is Spreading Quickly capslocknews.com/new-global-vir…

Study: Democrats Obsessed With MTG Because They’re Attracted To Her americaisms.com/study-democrat… Marjorie Taylor Greene 🇺🇸 Marjorie Taylor Greene

BREAKING: Hurricane Season Canceled After Storms Unionize for Better Working Conditions americaisms.com/hurricane-seas…

Supreme Court Rules 6–3 That Memes Are Now Legally Binding Contracts americaisms.com/supreme-court-…

CDC: People With Dirt On Clintons Have 843% Greater Risk Of Suicide babylonbee.com/news/cdc-peopl… babylonbee.com/news/cdc-peopl…

BREAKING: State Department Designates WNBA As Terrorist Organization theonion.com/state-departme…

Ocasio-Cortez Appears On 'The Price Is Right,' Guesses Everything Is Free babylonbee.com/news/ocasio-co…

Congress Members To Wear Barcodes So Lobbyists Can Scan Prices, Self-Checkout babylonbee.com/news/congress-…

Man Identifying As 6-Year-Old Crushes Game-Winning Homer In Tee-Ball Championship babylonbee.com/news/man-ident…

Mamdani Vows To Knock Down World Trade Center To Build More Affordable Housing babylonbee.com/news/mamdani-v… babylonbee.com/news/mamdani-v…

Federal Judge Overturns Law Of Gravity babylonbee.com/news/federal-j… babylonbee.com/news/federal-j…

BREAKING: Temperatures are soaring to a catastrophic 81 degrees Fahrenheit.

Governor Whitmer Bans Reverse Parking, Declares It a Threat to Democracy americaisms.com/governor-whitm…

BREAKING: IRS Just Days Away from Creating Nuclear Weapons americaisms.com/irs-just-days-…

Mexican Restaurant's Authenticity Questioned After Experiencing Zero ICE Raids babylonbee.com/news/taco-bell…

Bezos Wedding Guests Delighted By Amazon Worker With Ring Tied To Collar Crawling Down Aisle theonion.com/bezos-wedding-…