Triage in 2021 summed up: Me: “do you have any covid symptoms?” Patient: “no I just have a cold, I’m vaccinated” [repeat for 12 hours]

*sips Mountain Dew - banned in over 100 countries* “i just don’t trust the vaccine”

Truly a bold move for a group of old people who likely can’t list all the medicine they take stopping them from having heart attacks daily

Utah's Republican Governor Spencer Cox, as he vetoes a ban on trans athletes passed by the state legislature, notes 75,000 high school athletes and only four are transgender. "Rarely has so much fear and anger been directed at so few."

she’s a 10 but she likes taking naps so she’s a 20

I would watch 9 seasons of this.

People who forget to eat are amazing to me. I miss one meal and I’m burning bridges with immediate family members. I miss two that’s organ failure, total body and mind shutdown by the end of one calendar day

Ok. I don't know who needs to hear this, but buckle up. Here's the deal. A thread 🧵

I'm begging you all to remember that a venti PSL isn't adequate hydration on the trail.

i can't see differences #HOTD  #HouseOfTheDragon

i be like “i can’t wait for fall fits” then fall comes and i dress like this

Happy first day of Fall.

Beagle puppies rescued from a medical testing facility got to meet Snoopy. (OC)

microdosing being a parent by listening to my patient tell the doctor a completely different story than they told me

How can we play soccer against whales when they don’t even have feet

Tell me you haven’t seen an emergency department in the last 3 years without telling me you haven’t seen an emergency department in the last 3 years

Five years ago today, Kaia, the “safety first” dog, taught us all how to buckle pup. 13/10

i wasn’t a good dog today april fools. i was so good

In case anyone was looking for a way to appear as creepy as possible in public, lock your keys in your trunk at an ALDI and then sit inside watching people bag their groceries.