objectively funny situation to be the subject of a deranged conspiracy theory the thesis of which is that, despite all evidence to the contrary, you are insanely goated at sports

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Colby-Jack is somehow even less than the sum of its parts. Two boring, dogshit cheeses combined to make a flavor that is miraculously even less distinct than its components

kind of incredible that they are creating a panopticon with ring cameras because nobody wants to be watched by big brother but everybody wants to be big brother so making everyone build their own local surveillance networks was an easy sell

I don't care I don't want my video game chat app to become an instrument of the police state

IT'S HAPPENING

Ouugghhh... So much pollen... Lost in the sauce...

"Elon Musk has a dumber, cowboy brother" feels like the kind of desperate plot you'd pull out in season 13 of a long running sitcom

there is such beauty in the antics of silly little guys sometimes that it makes me want to cry

because ice agents have been executing u.s. citizens with zero legal consequence

boy do i have the interactive multimedia science fiction story for you

“hey dude, how’s it going?” yeah pretty good, i’ve started to get this kind of gnawing dread every time i throw a little piece of plastic in the bin and i vividly visualise billions of people doing the exact same thing for decades but other than that pretty good, how about you?

So, like, we are fully not regulating pollution or climate change in the United States anymore Cool. Cool cool. Extremely normal. 79 year old president that exists perpetually close to death at all times is burning the survivability of our entire species, who cares.

Could you imagine if there were journalists whose beat was covering magicians, but they think magic is real, so they're always breathlessly reporting on the lady they saw cut in half.

History books are going to view this administration as a stain that permanently unraveled the entire country’s institutions practically overnight