I would eat my first born child if it guaranteed cilantro would never come in contact with my food ever again

Hi YETI I’m sure you don’t get this complaint often but could you possibly create a cup that prevent my coffee from burning my tongue 4 hours after brewing it thank you

Do you think my neighbors are mad at me for playing Hey Ya! 24 hours a day

ppl that drive old undercover cop cars and get mad ppl are going the speed limit when they’re riding everyone’s ass ?? like did you even think before you decided to be a fake ass cop or what

Girls be dating boys that don’t know their middle name when my coworker one morning asked what I wanted from McDonalds and since then he’s brought me my coffee order correctly every day I promise it’s not hard your man just ain’t trying

I’m just gonna say it Wawa fucking sucks and if you disagree I know there’s no chance you’ve ever been to Sheetz

If I’m ever not saying anything don’t worry I’m okay I’m just thinking abt this commercial

Praying Olivia Rodrigo is the surprise guest at rolling loud

It's my #Twitterversary! I have been on Twitter for 10 years, since 13 Oct 2011 (via Twi Age 🥳).

Hello MTV, and welcome to my crib

what are y’all wearing to Spotify Wrapped

Day 2 in Titusville and I’m borderline blacked out with my dad at 4 pm I am so lucky I got out of here

I hope the kids that got to be on legends of the hidden temple realize how lucky they are

No one ever shuts the fuck up abt that one Frank Ocean transition but why aren’t we talking abt Kid Cudi’s The Prayer/Day n’ Nite transition instead

It's my #Twitterversary! I have been on Twitter for 11 years, since 13 Oct 2011 (via Twi Age 🥳).

Seriously why does no one know how to drive when they reach a roundabout I need to know what causes the confusion

Hope everyone’s feeling fergalicious today

You’re stuck on an island forever with one cd is it Billy Joel The Stranger or Fergie The Dutchess which is more versatile