ok so a month ago I asked which eye-themed podcast protagonist would win in a fight and finally. the results are in.

cw // fourth wall break unreality Lrt Yes.

Sorry followers but I seem to have fallen into a hole

I must confess, dear followers, I do feel bad for him. I wish for him to do better and improve. But it’s just.. a bit much for me

The church followed the baffling belief, common in warmer states, that if it’s way too hot outside, then it should be way too cold inside to balance things out.

cw // drowning Update on this. The hole has filled with a liquid that I am now drowning in

Hypothesis: shit.

Good morning followers. I am currently on a short break from broadcasting while the weather plays and for once nothing terrible is happening

Oh by the way, the hole finally spit me out. Guess that whole situation sort of resolved itself

[an emoji of president herbert hoover being eaten by a pterodactyl in the suburbs]

Good afternoon

two trucks, holding hands two trucks, holding hands the passion, the passion, my big fat heart expands

FACT: We are gay.

My employer forced me to go to a doctor recently who said I am “over working myself” and that the reason I keep collapsing is because of “exhaustion”. This is why I don’t trust Earth doctors

Update! The amulet stuck to my hand has gotten stuck to today’s news which in turn has gotten stuck to my desk. Which by extensions means I am also stuck to the desk. Stay tuned for more updates

Fuck your heart Fuck your bones Have fun eating shit forever in hell alone

CECIL: Carlos looked nervous. I’ve never seen that kind of look on someone with that strong of a jaw.