i hope Aragorn never shaves me i look too damn sexy like this

@actual_gollum @ActualNori It will go 1. Thranduil's eyebrows, 2. Legolas' hair/bow/arrow/ass/whatever 3. Elrond's eyebrows.

@ActualNori @actual_gollum Kíli Im sure someone wil make Gandalf's stick

@ActualNori @actual_gollum Faramir who dat?

@ActualNori @actual_gollum Faramir Who the hell is that

I don't need guards at the gate because of how awesomely powerful I am #diduseemyflamingswordyeahithoughtso

where is my homes Gandalf?

Joy to the world! Oh Sauron's dead! And Aragorn is King! Gandalf comes again! Frodo's destroyed the ring! Legolas's still hot #still hot

I am sorry I have not been so active lately

sorry I haven't been on lately, wha did I miss

Ah I spot another saruman floating around.

AH I have return! what have i missed yet again my fellow twatters?

Who in Davey Jone's name is Bofur and why did he drink the rum?

I haven't the slightest clue what middle earth is like but I heard from a friend who heard from a friend who heard they brew the best rum

i have not been on in ages and I have nearly 600 followers? why thank you my dear friends, you are all under my spell, clearly