<< that it didn't panic me any more. To block out the sounds, I'd pull my pillow over my head, pressing my palm against it as hard as >>

<< I could so it was squashed against my ear. They were still there, only slightly muffled this time. 'You know the only reason I'm >>

<< still here! I can't leave her with you.' ''Like you care about her! She's just a little brat. No one cares about her.' And with >>

<< that, there was a slam of the front door and the sound of a car engine roaring to life, then he was gone, but the darkness was >>

<< still encroaching on my mind and the sobs were beginning to grow so loud that I was scared she'd hear me, and if she heard me, I >>

<< knew exactly what would happen. My cheek would be red for days, and I didn't like that. Lifting my hand, I press my fingertips against >>

<< my cheek gently, pausing a tear in it's tracks as it rolled down my cheek before wiping it away, trying to hide all evidence of it. >>

<< It didn't work, though. I could feel that patch on my pillow, like a puddle the rain had formed on a soaking wet day in the Fall. >>

<< But just as quickly as it had started, the sudden sensation of falling came over me and with a jerk of my body, it was as if I'd >>

<< been slammed into my mattress, like I'd fallen from the clouds above, only I hadn't. I'd been laying here the whole time in the >>

<< safety of my bed. My grown up bed, not my child bed. Not back home and definitely not with her. Lifting my hand to my cheek, just >>

<< like I had in the dream, I can feel that they're damp. The tears hadn't all been in the dream, but my pillow was dry and as my eyes >>

<< fell on the space beside me, #Jamie lay with his back towards me, hugging his pillow. No, he can't be here. It's late.. too late for >>

<< him to still be here.* #Jamie! Up! Get up, it's time to go! *My voice was almost whiny as I moved my leg, kicking him in the ass. >>

<< The rule was that we have our fun, then he leaves. Not we have our fun then he can stay over. No! Definitely not. *Raising my voice >>

<< louder, I kick #Jamie again, harder this time.* Come on! Get up, get up, get uuuuuuuup! *He groaned at my kicking, but he knew he >>

<< had to go, so without even a words, he got himself out of bed, dressed and out of my apartment and it only took him 10 minutes. A >>

<< new record. He was used to it, though, and I knew he'd be fine. So after listening for a moment, and hearing a car door closing on >>

<< the street below, I knew that #Jamie had managed to hail a cab and was now on his way home to #Alice, where he should be, so I rolled >>

<< over, grabbed my pillow and hugged it tight to my chest, hoping that I could fall over into a dreamless sleep.*