It is what it is

Me when I found out I don’t get a stimulus check

Nothing but speed baby

Not sure if I’ve ever seen more heartbreaking news. The beefy frito burrito was the best item $1 could but hands down. 2 of those and a large water have fed me more times that I can imagine.

sometimes the more golf I play the worse I get

You can’t win if you don’t play, I’m really not sure why I haven’t retired yet

#FreePizzaFriday is here! Hit that RT button for your chance to win a free large one topping from Mister B's! Must follow to win. 🍕🍕

If you’re one of the people that leaves a car length between you and the car in front of you after you order and prevent me from pulling up to the thing to order I can’t stand you

Hello Dustin! I accepted the UFC offer to fight you, but told them it must happen in 2020. I’m ready for Nov 21st, given that cards recent injury issues, as well as any of the December dates, the 12th and the 19th. I’ll also still donate the $500k to The Good Fight Foundation 🙏

College sucks honestly

Just met a cop with a headlight out, should I pull him over?

Go to college where you’re required to take web courses on blackboard with professors who don’t know how to use blackboard

I thought before I’ve had bad days but today changes what a bad day feels like.

Garrett Wilhelm

What’s the food truck lookin like tonight? Bowling Green FC @shogunexpress