π§ππΌπ½ π§ππΆπ½π
@TwopTwips
Please listen to my awful music by following βThe Rocket Houseβ on yer usual music platforms.
ID:77187402
https://spotify.link/2XJSZWCg9Cb 25-09-2009 10:58:39
30,3K Tweets
165,0K Followers
3,2K Following
π§ππΌπ½ π§ππΆπ½π JONA LEWIE. Form infantry into square formation, preferably with decent artillery support.
ANNOY MC Hammer by going to a museum with him, pointing at every exhibit and asking βcan I touch this?β (via GlennyRodge)
My new song βArseholesβ out now. Joey Barton gets a late inclusion in the lyrics after his recent arseholeishness.
open.spotify.com/track/7aTyLRPeβ¦
MAKE everything you say seem more festive by adding βPa rup a pom pomβ to every sentence.
(via David Whitley)
TREAT the children of vegan friends this Christmas with this ideal festive 'selection box'
(via Owen Dixon)
WRITING 'You fuckwit' at the end of an email is an effective way of seeing if your boss reads them all the way through.
(via Craig Deeley πͺπΊπ³οΈβπ πΊπ¦)
RECREATE the feeling of turning safe search off in Google, in real life, by going into Swansea town centre on a Friday night. eightiesdisco
SURPRISE your hamster by smashing through the door of his plastic house at 5am with a cocktail sausage shouting 'Police!'
(via simon buschenfeld)
π§ππΌπ½ π§ππΆπ½π Make people think Jimmy Carr's in your room by telling a joke, licking your thumb and rubbing it up and down the window.