"We went to a seafood restaurant on our date, and I had a lovely bouillabaisse. It was so romantic" "Fish stew?" "No, just a peck on the cheek at the end of the night"

You show this to kids today and they wouldn't have a clue.

I heard a voice on TV say "You've got four hours to capture Judi Dench." I wondered what bizarre kind of show that was and looked up to see it was an advert for #PortraitArtistOfTheYear2023

Watch this. And never let anyone who helped Boris Johnson become PM near power again. Don’t read the papers who helped him either. Brexit. Covid. Corruption. N Ireland. Debasing of standards. Promotion of non talent. So much damage. But he didn’t do it alone.

She actually said “do your own research”. This is utterly superb.

Have you heard that song "shit fireworks"? It's a banger.

Fifteen times I've written to Brad Pitt and not once has he written back. Arrogant twat.

#bbclaurak: "The UK's huge success of the vaccine programme... was probably linked to the fact that we had left the EU... " Dr June Raine(Boss, MHRA): “We’ve been able to authorise supply of this vaccine using provisions under European law which exist until January 1st”

For crying out loud! How many times do I have to debunk this absolute boll**** about the success of the vaccine rollout being benefit of Brexit! IT’S WASN’T! ! If you think BBC News (UK) need educating RT this as widely as possible

‘The thinner tree was cut years ago and the big one has been holding and feeding it since then. They "wake up" together in the spring and "go to sleep" together in the autumn’ Inosculation is a natural phenomenon in which parts of two different trees, commonly but not

🚨Sunak’s Government just confirmed it will rush ahead with its plan to rob teachers & millions of workers of their right to strike, force them to work against their will & sack them if they refuse THIS IS THE MOMENT! WORKERS ACROSS THE COUNTRY MUST STAND TOGETHER! ✊ Trades Union Congress

Computer hackers are getting to be so sophisticated. I just had one invite me to a wine and opera evening.

James O'Brien We can all be refugees Nobody is safe, All it takes is a mad leader Or no rain to bring forth food, We can all be refugees We can all be told to go, We can be hated by someone For being someone. - Benjamin Zephaniah, 'We Refugees

Always great to have Rob Hughes involved in anything comedic, and the latest Why Does This Thing Exist? (Podcast) is no exception He's 6'3 you know. Why is that relevant? No idea. But apparently, it is

Rhiwbina Comedy Festival Friday 430 Show Fri 29th Mar 4pm The Deri Inn #Rhiwbina #UKcomedy Beefy's Comedy Club LINE-UP Kathryn Mather Stella Graham Rob Hughes mrs barbara nice Carl Morgan (Host) TIX jokepit.com/comedy-in/card… FIND⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️COMEDY #JOKEPIT

hahahaahha had my phone off all afternoon and was like, why are my notifications nuts ?

Places on Earth that don't look real - thread 🧵 1. Namibia, where the desert meets the ocean

Please share this...all eyes on Rafah. This is the harsh reality for families in Gaza. The child asks: “Where can we go, where can we go” The mother: “Walk, God’s land is vast. Praise to God”

Many thanks to Devon & Cornwall Police for their assistance with an injured deer last night near Kingsbridge. Poor thing was a victim of hit and run by the look of it. Please consider wildlife when driving in the country. A slower car could have stopped in time.