Related: soundcloud.com/djbrainz/garag…

Universe doing some interesting karmic balancing with me today. I found a fiver on the floor on my dog walk. Get home and see someone has keyed my car deliberately across 5 panels down the passenger side. Thanks, Buddha? TL;DR - Waa waa waaaa waa waa I'm a baby.

My eBay parcel arrived wrapped in a recent copy of the Daily Mail. Hope he gets stuck at passport control on a Spanish holiday.

I honestly think that if Jason Donovan rereleased his 1989 song "too many broken hearts in the world" but the replaced the words 'broken hearts' with 'fucking cunts' he's got a worldwide hit on his hands.

3PM today on Sub FM. Playing 100% remixes of vintage eskimo throat yodelling.

Here's a Rafi bomb for you to listen to whilst you're in your toilet kitchen making coffee or taking a dump. soundcloud.com/djbrainz/super…

Review of my last Grindr encounter

When you're expecting your Amazon Prime Day order of bourbon and lubricant, but instead it's the lads with the good news 📖💫

Meanwhile on Irish breakfast television.

We live, bitches. @subfm twitch.tv/subfm

Just uploaded: Live audio of an active prolapse struggling to deploy cleanly... sorry, I mean my latest show audio soundcloud.com/djbrainz/bussi…

Wish they'd help my Soundcloud experience by accurately tagging when a track is "dogshit organ house"

Can someone explain to me why this 2025 turd youtube.com/watch?v=Xtq_A2… sounds like this 2007 DJMAX Official banger (to me) youtube.com/watch?v=Nj2CZl… Are they both just doing different impressions of The Neptunes? Are they completely different? Or is someone copying someone?

Made me stand up, put my hand on my heart and drink a bo'le o' wa'er 🇬🇧

When I compress your WAVs down to dirty MP3s I imagine them screaming like Judge Doom in Who Framed Roger Rabbit when he gets run over by a steamroller

That's the kind of nickname you'd get in Ireland because you've spent over a tenner on a new coat

Ali Express Facebook ads always coming with the fire. Jesus Christ.

Switched weeks, innit. Be an absolute lad and hang out for the bants, yeah? 3-5PM on Sub FM you know there's 3 minutes of footage missing from that tape and they edited it in premiere pro absolutely wild

My favourite use of ChatGPT today

I have way too many Korean cheerleaders in my YouTube shorts algorithm to not be on some sort of list. They'll be making me introduce myself to neighbours by the end of the year.