Just get better & better

Sucks to realize that Zuck could absolutely beat my ass

Ran into Alex Hooper tonight and sweet lord, it’s so nice to be around good people

Me preparing for the cringiest resistance memes of all time

Not only is Lebby completely blind to how bad of a visual this is, but Art doesn't even think at any moment how this could hurt not only his son-in-law, but make his employer look bad. Both just don't... care.

People like to villainize weed over alcohol, but like- weed’s never made me perform stand up comedy…

Dude I based my entire personality and sense of humor on Matthew Perry. His memoir is incredible. I hope he’s at peace, whatever that might mean.

I think I speak for all SAG/AFTRA actors when I say it’s relief to know I’ll once again not be able to get work for not being hot enough, either physically or in terms of social media engagement, instead of just being on strike.

the masculine urge to put on a shawl collar cardigan and breathe a heavy sigh

I was an All-League safety in high school, according to reporting from Charissa Thompson.

This is what going to college for theater is like x.com/GarbageHuman23…

QUE GOLAZOOOOO #USMNT

Ok tell me why I just went into my bathroom and found Diddy hiding in my shower

Nothing worse than a slow news day.

Oklahoma is just tanking to get the first pick in the draft.

(Pulls OU hat and shirt out of storage) I believed in this team all year long.

Just bombed so hard a guy in the front row asked me what I do for a living

Moving in silence but also fuck you