We hear so many people who are struggling to feel better and feel hopeless because they are "trying" so hard to change. People say things like " I am trying to change my thinking but it is so hard" or I am able to change my behavior but I keep relapsing.

When we do this we get more hopeless and frustrated. We are taught to work hard to make ourselves better, happier, more successful. In fact, it is only hard when we are doing it backwards....when we are trying to change what is already created. preview.mailerlite.com/e6h3t7

If you are having trouble moving on from a broken heart you might want to listen to this. WE spend sooo much time talking about how we have been "done wrong" and we don't realize that this continues our suffering.

Talking about why it happened and what I learned from it via analysis is just not helpful to regaining your healthy state of mind. It makes it seem that the suffering is from the event or what the person who did to you rather than on how thought keeps you stuck in the past

. Remember love doesn't hurt, insecurity is what hurtsEpisode 52: The Key To Letting Go of Hurt Feelings and a Broken Heart Is Not Analysis 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/m7q2i8

My dog and I were competing in a nosework fun meet and the only mistake we made was because I talked myself into calling an alert when I knew better. Guess I better listen to this myself! Episode 53: How We Talk Ourselves Out of Doing Things 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/k3g0l0

If you like Psychology has it backwards you may be interested in our intensive weekend Dec10-12 HST. We will video tape so if the time zone you live in makes it impossible to attend in person for part of it you can catch up !! Go to hawaiicounselingandeducationcenter.com for more info.

Episode 54: What About Boundaries? 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/h0w9e3

Happy New Year! Join us this year for more of Psychology has it Backwards the podcast! For individual help as a practitioner or a person, join us for The Program on Wednesdays and Thursdays! Episode 62: New Year's Inspirations vs. Resolutions 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/k0i6y8y2t3

People get insecure when listening to others and then try to help them by "being positive", helpful or trying to problem solve. Listening from a space of love and wisdom brings to mind ways of responding that are calming and appropriate for the person in the moment.

Please do look toward a positive, secure feeling to guide what you say to others but let's not make positivity the villain.Episode 63: Toxic Positivity? 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/r4c6j1j3v4

Treatment based on drawing out the health in people is so hopeful! People find happiness and security as they rediscover that they can never be broken.Episode 66: Trauma-Focused Treatment vs. Health-Focused Treatment 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/w9l6p9y7x1

Wow ! This is our 80th podcast. We get lots of questions regarding decision making, procrastination, and trusting your self to make the best decision. I hope you will enjoy this episode.Episode 80: Decision-Making: Knowing When It's Right 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/y3s2o8n9g2

Take a look at how understanding the Principles can revolutionize your work as a therapist, coach, teacher, mentor or just human being. I've got a chapter in this book as do many wonderful therapists and coaches. Check it out onAmazon: amazon.com/dp/B0B12HXF94

Episode 88: FEELING vs. feelings 🛎️📨 {$share_url} Check out our podcast. This is number 89! Psychology Has it Backwards or on line psychologyhasitbackwards.com

Episode 99: Wisdom vs. The Intellect in Therapy 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/a5f1r3u0m2

Awakening to the Power of Innate Mental Health hcechawaii.com/awakening-to-t…

We wanted to thank everyone who downloaded this podcast and made it so successful! We are humbled by the stories of hope and change from people around the globe. Just our little effort to reduce needless suffering of people Episode 104: Gratitude 🛎️📨 preview.mailerlite.com/z3b9w1f7r4