“it’s pretty simple, we don’t need to bring in a writer on this.”

gonna ask my wife if she’ll divorce me for just one night.

arch game was strong today

it's not that i'm embarrassed to play video games but i think it's a win that someone i've worked with for two years only just learned today that i do.

whoever's in charge of closing the loop on this is doing a terrible job because i keep getting looped in.

every major road in st. louis is on the brink of structural collapse but i'll be damned if the city doesn't show up to sweep my little street on the third monday of every month.

my office neighbor—let’s call her Mary Macallan Lay—just switched from airpods to airpods MAX and i’m worried it’s because i interrupted her podcasts one too many times

me at 4:35pm after wasting the whole day

how i be greeting any and all men after three (3) beers

nobody: my mother-in-law’s phone receiving a text: 🔔🛎️✨🎵🚨

wait no let's talk

that one CD whose whole thing is “nobody reads copy.”

for those of us not on a dating app, viewing a LinkedIn profile is the riskiest, most nerve-racking thing we have left.

i trust this placemat over any 5-star yelp review

bby's first layoff 🥲

"thank you for applying for our Junior Copy Boy Intern position. after reviewing candidates for 60 days, we have decided to buy a chatGPT subscription. best of luck paying your mortgage."

i am “taking my airpods out to listen to the matchbox twenty playing at the grocery store” years old

did it hurt? when you read the style guide and saw they use the oxford comma?