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Future so bright he technically doesn’t need the shades

This could be an entire season of Maury

Hardcore Catholics sound like my grandma when we play scrabble together and she gets mad and tells me anal doesn’t count

tucker is so committed to being counter culture that he's a leftist now, he's ring chasing, he's kevin durant, he's lebron in miami, he's my aunt susan when she turned 37 in 2003

no democrat would ever try that hard to get elected

Not very fuckin stealth I’d say

School shootings

By going to war Trump is actually helping the poor families of America by giving them easier access to receiving triangle flags than they had before

Comedians are like modern day philosophers in that they probably also don’t have health insurance

When is it going to dawn on you morons that it doesn’t matter who’s president. Israel has wanted the US in this since Oct 7, they’ve been trying to engineer ways to pull us in and they were gonna get it regardless of who was president because both parties are captured by zionism

There is no opposition party. There is no national adversarial media.

Liberals bout to be sounding like Allen Iverson when they see this

It’s a good thing we kissed the tip of Israel’s penis then

She literally hasn’t even said a word against what is happening

If JD Vance’s mom can do it then why can’t we also try to trade him for crack rocks

Ever been to a bad orgy? What a cluster fuck

Lance Armstrong was arrested on suspicion of DUI but don’t worry nobody is more prepared to transition to commuting on a bicycle

Coworker: what’s the difference between marines and soldiers? Me: ive never heard of child marines

She hasn’t even come out verbally against bombing Iran but go off

A lot of people are anti circumcision but to me it’s the only way you can still get a bowl cut and not look like a school shooter