Sometimes I think

People out there fighting about cereal then milk or milk then cereal Bitch I do milk, cereal then the bowl

Cant wait for family guy funny moments 5 to be dropped on Spotify, that track was HEAT🥵🥵🔥🔥🔥👏🏻😤💦😤👏🏻💦♠️😈🔥♠️😓🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿😉↔️#bathroom

Nothing screams failure more than being in a public bathroom alone for so long that the automatic lights turn off

I eat pears now

I can’t believe I just farted on my pasta im so embarrassed

Allow me to count every number ever: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, ate, nine, tenne, oneteen, twoteen, 3teen, fourteen, fifteen, sickstean, seavunteene, atetein, neinteen, twenty, tweneven, twelve, twenteen, twenty fore, tentyfifv, twennysikcques, fourtie7, a hunne, E?

They used to call me “The Iron Glooch” in highschool... still don’t know why

I have sooo many beans in my pockets rn

Can Women Fart?

Bobby Shmurda was released from prison about a week ago

The fountain of youth is the McDonald’s sprite fountain drink

I was reading an article while on the shitter today that was so astonishing I actually stood up, pulled my pants back up, and then shit myself because I was so shocked Article: brunomars.us/rumor-come-bru…

Broccoli is kinda weird, it’s like a small tree that you eat... kinda weird to me idk what do you guys think should we ban broccoli for looking too much like trees

Born to shit... forced to wipe

Just found out I’m a Reece’s pisces

Uhh

Darude Sandstorm

Yo mama