la vida me pide mucho y yo solo quiero estar durmiendo así con el amor de mi vida

me to the zoomer guy at work that I see losing his spark in the teams meetings.

went to the chud store today and everyone said they were happy to see my stupid chud face again and ruined my joke about you. fmscl

uhh which century is it again?

hey man, when do you die? When can I put on my calendar that you're dead? I'm very interested in knowing the date of your death, I'd like to know when that's happening so we can circle back then.

so I fiddle when I can and I work when I should 🎶

Past a certain age, a man without a DUI can be a bad thing.

Shit, hell, damn, ass, piss, fuck

screw loose emoji

how could anyone have guessed it was just about wanting to tie more of your personally identifying data to the bundle they're already selling to data brokers/advertisers?? I'm absolutely SHOCKED

my wife is leaving me and her lawyers are pursuing custody of half of the plex server.

[moves my hand around widlly really fast on the keyboard like a panicked Thing from Addam's Family]

THIS ANIMATION 🔥

"he's an oldhead"