Whenever I’m watching a tense scene on tv, my dog starts practicing her ASMR.

But, doctor, I’M the House of Gucci.

The two strongest creatures on this planet: 1) Mother with Child Trapped Under Bus 2) Dad Bringing in Groceries in One Trip

*Customer orders* Barista: You got it, baby. Customer: Excuse me?! Barista: Oh, no, not a term of endearment. I’m calling you a tiny, whiny baby. It’s a negative thing.

My review of the Sun: it’s one star

Olives are just salt Gushers.

Chips hit different on the beach.

Much like the titular character of the incredible comic series by Neil Gaiman, a child just yelled “Sandman” and dove headfirst into a dune.

Felt weird every time Tom Cruise was called Pete instead of Top Gun.

Boss: You know, I’ve never seen you cut your hair. Me: Well, I don’t invite you to the appointments.

Barbarian (2022): The true Barbarian are the friends we made along the way.

Jaws swam so that Deep Blue Sea could have a hat like a shark’s fin.

Realizing “Bustin’ makes me feel good” works in any context.

Are you my two front teeth, cuz you’re all I want for Christmas. 😎

Such incredible performers, including @Allison_Tolman, Lee Shorten, @tamarpelzig, william beinbrink, kG, Will Cooper, Charlotte Benesch, Mishel Prada, Menachem Silverstein and Edan Moses. And @Allison2Names used her incredible voice to read the action lines.

I haven’t seen All Quiet on the Western Front because I’m too scared to find out whether war is good or bad. 😕

All Terminators are cops, but not all cops are Terminators.

Gandalf: A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to. Boss: Gandalf, we really need you to start getting here when your shift starts.

Hocus Pocus (1993): Some guy burns three women in a school.