new york feels (and is!) so safe i actually find it so comical when people drone on about it being unsafe. like im sorry but have you even been here. you can walk around manhattan alone at 4 am with no issues lmao

ah, my favorite part of taxes: ARE YOU AWARE OF THE EXISTENCE OF YONKERS???

This is living ragebait. I mean, do I address the orientation first, or the fact that it's Apple Maps?

I played my small part. #everylittletweetcounts

it’s officially “don’t talk to me until I’ve dried my sweat off” commuting season in our nation’s capital

I love that ATC audio is public.

I opened this up to quote RT this but I'm realizing I just... have no words. So... here's *this* I guess, so you can *also* live with it uncomfortably taking up space in your brain.

Slowly organizing photos and found an old fave! Fun fact: when butterflies land wings open, it CAN mean they're letting other butterflies know they're dtf, so... text your crush🦋Fun fact 2: I was told that by a guy at the museum when this happened and it was kinda uncomfortable.

Wanna contrast this w/ how I genuinely entered my bathroom yesterday like a SWAT team leader armed w/ bug spray b/c a HUGE fly found its way into my apt. Huge. First thought it might be a carpenter bee. Still shook. ...Mostly unrelated, just wanted to get that story off my chest.

I keep finding more and more reasons to never check my baggage. I've spent over a week in California living out of a Jansport and small purse, and I'll take that over THE BEES anyway. Even if they took care of them, just knowing this happened...

This pop up says I got more impressions in the past week than I have in ages... right under my follower count that’s lower than a few days ago. Takeaway: the more people actually see what I post, the less they want to. Hey, no hard feelings, guys...🥲 ha

the co-op partner everyone wishes they had

A humanoid robot won a half-marathon in Beijing in 50 minutes and 26 seconds, finishing faster than Ugandan runner Jacob Kiplimo's world record. Read more: cnn.it/4dWXNC6

Okay, fess up: who genetically engineered all these giant flies zipping around the past week and how did you defy the laws of aerodynamics for them to still be fast enough to evade my (impeccably timed) swats?

Hot take: Reducing transit on weekends actually reduces ridership on weekdays. Habits like consistency, and cutting weekend hours breaks transit-riding habits. This is especially true for people who work weekends and tourists, which are a growing share of riders in major cities.

Netflix is telling me I should watch an animated techno-medieval movie made by the people who created the cyberpunk cat game. Why not just put that in my queue automatically, guys?

Oh, and the Trevor Noah show I almost went to is on Netflix now too! (Saw him a bit later - different venue, same tour.) Haven’t watched the special yet but his set was awesome (because of course it was) so I can safely recommend it!