~ somethin' closer to real talk than he usually had the balls for. We, three, were too good at not communicatin' at all. sayin' things ~

~ with silence or screams, evasions and half truths, simple knowledge of one another, assumptions that didn't need further explanation. We ~

~ most often didn't /have/ to talk. So we didn't. Which made it all the more uncomfortable when Diego Ruiz tried. Especially concernin' ~

~ the subject. "I know things have been--" I gave him another weak, almost sympathetic smile, for all the things he didn't know and ~

~ couldn't begin to understand, reachin' out to lay a hand on his shoulder as I leaned up to press a kiss to his cheek, smoothly slippin' ~

~ into the front seat of my car to make my escape before things could get too real.} It's not your fault, sug. We all do the best we can ~

~ until we can't. I'm alright. I promise. {My tone was more assured on the last, and he seemed to finally pick up on the change in me, ~

~ that I wasn't the fragile creature he expected to find, dyin' of cravings or goin' out of my mind with turmoil over Cain, ~

~ somethin' which set him at ease as much as it perturbed him. He didn't seem particularly hurt by the realization that I either found ~

~ Jesus or somebody worthy of shackin' up with. More curious than anything. But it was there. Just the smallest sting of unintended ~

~ rejection. He'd wanted to be the one to save me, but he was always a little late to the party. Nothin' I could do to make that any ~

~ easier. I felt like a middle schooler tellin' the boy who's had a crush on her that she already has a date to the dance. If it were ~

~ anybody else, I'd be real smug and amused by that, but it didn't bring me any special pleasure to let Diego Ruiz down, when he was the ~

~ only one who never seemed to let /me/ down. Can't help the way you feel. Man, could he play it off though, even as he faltered. ~

~ "Good. Good. I'm glad you're good. I'll....see you in the morning. Well, no, I guess I won't. Just text me when--" I smiled more ~

~ genuinely, realizin' I'd missed our usual breakfast date bein' with @AbruptCatalyst so long, amusement seepin' into my tone as I teased ~

~ him with the very realization of his disappointment just as much as I set him up for the reverse.} I'll see you in the mornin', kid. ~

~ I'll come by before I go around for pick-ups. You're buyin'. {It was wrong, lettin' him hold on to even the smallest hope, but ~

~ Diego Ruiz was about the only normal I wanted anything to do with anymore. Too bad for him, and Cain, I'd trade it all for ~

~ @AbruptCatalyst, given the chance. And God, was I hopin'. I understood him in that.}