I wish Barney in Pretty Woman was my uncle

I just got to hear Mya sing “whose draws are these??? You know I wear a size 4!” LIVE. I am unwell

Waking up feeling energetic and amazing because I’ve finally learned to control myself??? Who would have thought

tiny desk is one thing but we gotta bring back MTV unplugged

Weeeee so many fun things all summer I am so excited 🥰

My triumphant return to bartending included a patron telling me I look like I’m 18. I LOVE ITTTTTT

Yes

Taking matters into my own hands is literally so exhausting

I FOR ONCE don’t have to post about how I miss smitty werbenmanjensen because I finally saw her 🥹🥹🥹🥹

On Sundays I do shots of tequila with my fiancé and watch Real Housewives of New Jersey.

I miss Obama desperately

Yearly reminder that Brookfield is not Milwaukee or even Milwaukee county. *Milwaukee based hair stylist* … whose residence and business are both in Waukesha county 🤣 🤡 🤡

Why do I feel like every republican has a southern accent 🤣

Me and my 2 Aries parents just fueling each others hatred of republicans via text 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Fought with strangers on the journal sentinel’s Instagram last night. No regrets.

Imagine being proud to be American 🤣🤣🤣🤣

What’s with all the dramatic wedding photos??? Like serious, weird, and stern???? Enough.

Caring is cringey