How it feels drinking tea from the coffee table

Mint tea really changed the whole game beveragely speaking

This is my nephew, Entrecôte

Making very simple pasta and muttering to myself like phwoar bloody hell it never ends does it, never ends

Feels so quaint buying something on eBay, like going to a farmers’ market

There’d be a full on Thermopylae style battle if you joined Sorrento to the Bellarine

It would kinda suck having the borders of your country redrawn because a US president was upset Obama was rude to him 15 years ago

I wonder what people did before the rain radar, I guess you just had to go off a vague sense of portent, the movement of birds, uneasiness of the horses, etc., etc.

I love seeing these polls, Sliwa looks like he’s on his way to launch a coup in the Sahel

Going undercover at MIFF in red chunky glasses and some sort of shawl. Loudly saying Yes, it recalls for me a conversation I had with Simon Holmes à Court (French pronunciation). Looking around and repeating myself louder. Someone asks who I’m talking to and I make a break for it

When Europeans use a comma instead of a dot it’s like Oh, well… ooh la la

Getting together with the boys and comparing BMIs

I feel very ashamed when I buy baked beans at the supermarket like I’m looking over my shoulder and positioning them under some San Pellegrino and tastefully packaged South Tyrolean chocolates

I’m so obsessed with the productivity roundtable, Jim Chalmers and various members of the business community sitting round a table like sooo.. anyone have any ideas haha

Kinds looks like a cycling outfit

Getting home from MIFF film about female friendship and watching YouTube video ranking the fighter jets

I feel like the ant with the bindle when I ask for relish at the bakery

Mr Jim Chalmers I have the secret to Australian productivity growth but I need the funds to unlock it, please provide me with one billion dollars in steam gift cards

Feels gauche to even bother criticising Donald trump, feels like someone earnestly criticising mr bean