When you’re walking and you can feel your ass jiggling 😭😹

No one: Uber Eats Notification: good morning you fat piece of shit. Click the button to make shrimp arrive via private taxi

Im scaring the hoes by being too sweet

would've been a lot funnier if they did the opposite and said something like "Please contact us immediately if you see David Attenborough playing with Lego. He's aware of our terms."

this is very good for your literacy btw don't be ashamed to frequently google words you don't know, it's better to learn now instead of giving up especially in an age where literacy rates are at an all time low

when the tough era act turns off, i'm alone & my eyes start to tear up.

please mmiss me please be even a little bit upset please miss me even half as much as i miss you please

to this day, this song activates me like i were a russian sleeper cell

some of us actually just believe humans deserve better & that together we could get better. I wish you guys would stop aligning your takes with the billionaires hoarding all the wealth & making you believe the problem is poor people & not them being pests to humanity & earth.

when i call a ngga phone i should never hear fun in the background

When you go on a first date and he doesn’t kiss you so you have to wonder am I chopped or is he just respectful

Why won’t god let me forget you