I’d love you till my lungs give out I ain’t lying

Can I get you a drink to go? No but I’ll take a piece of that ass to go!

Wake up in the morning I got murder on my mind

I spend most night staring down at a cracked screen phone hoping it will light up just like you did my whole world

I ain’t putting in my two week notice, I’m putting in my two day notice. I’m leaving this bitch today

I just wanted the best for the kiddo

We’re all winners

I prefer all my bitches tatted-up and drankin’ whiskey

It’s usually harder than trigonometry

I don’t need friends, They don’t want someone like me doing better than them, I still can’t believe I really got rich

If nobody knows Biden the cheating mf president is trying to make our free country of America a country where you have no say of what’s wrong or right

I need a tennis partner to play with me and to practice with

No I don’t dance I just drink a lot hand me a Jager bomb and a jack and coke on the rocks

The second purpose of alcohol is to make your brain a damn etch-a-Sketch you shake and what’s it’s erased

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When you think you pass your exit but then you check and you still have 50 miles

My poor toilet it doesn’t deserve what’s coming for it

When your boss tells you he has to cut his puppy’s finger nails. I asked, I didn’t know dogs have fingers?