I love how with “you mustn’t let me keep you” the British invented an extremely polite way of telling someone to go away.

I just tutted at someone and they heard me. This adrenaline rush will last the rest of the day.

Derek 😂

I recently told an American friend some news and she said, “oh, you must be so excited!”

No, I’m British, the closest I get to “so excited” is quiet dread followed by surprised relief if it doesn’t go wrong.

youtube.com/shorts/Dp-KrCX…

Anywayz, nuff of dat malarkey. Wots bin goin on, myyyy dogs,myyyy peeps? Lotsa trubbble I hope 😏
Tape Life!!
#TallulahsTape

Where I bin?
I bin rollin, bruh 🌿🌿🌿🌿
Spring is springing 😈
#SpringTallulah

Guys I just picked Stanley the ferret up and he has a hard lump on his chest. Can’t afford to even get him seen or treated. I’m so scared for my baby I don’t no what to do

celebrating mama's birthed day and st paddyz day! #celebrityauthorbear #celebritybear #bearfluencer #craftbeer #teddybearauthors CAMRA

Jus bobbin on for a hot minute. Stole a strawberry dessert, no judge. Yoo wud too if ya cud 🍧 Yep, I iz 8 and still runnin wild.
8 iz da new 2, baby 😎 Tzus age like a fine wine. Nemesis (🐱🌈) brother is ageing like a banana 😏🐈‍⬛ I still rule da school around 'ere, innit 💅

Tend to wonder if ppl actually see messages from me or whether I should just stop posting… hear from ppl less and less these days which doesn’t help with anxiety and feelings of isolation… #MentalHealthMatters

We had to say good bye to this sweet boy today friends. Chewy will be taking a few days off. Love you friend 🧡

This triggered little loser Jimmy Kimmel - 😂

Unfunny asshole trying to make PedoWood snobs laugh. Cringe on steroids.

🚨 It’s estimated that 1 million pangolins have been captured in the wild & illegally sold on the black market. IFAW is working with partners globally to #StopWildlifeCrime .

Join us & pledge to protect pangolins and other exploited wildlife today. 🌎

Cannibal gangs are running around Haiti eating people and the media says you’re supposed to care more about the Oscars.

When a Brit says “that’s a shame” you know one of three things has happened:

1. They’ve just been told someone else’s bad news and they’re trying to sound sympathetic (and they might actually be quite glad about it)
2. They’ve just experienced very minor disappointment.
3.…

If you're on the left, you get a free pass. If you're on the right, they throw the book at you.

Ofcom is not fit for purpose.
It should be scrapped!

In 2019 Jo Brand joked about throwing acid over Nigel Farage on the BBC - No further action.

In 2020 Sophie Duker joked about killing white people on the BBC - No further action.

In 2020 Miriam Margolyes said she wanted Boris Johnson to die on Channel 4 while he was in hospital…