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Untreated ADHD can ruin lives. Especially in adults. And a LOT of adult ADHD goes untreated, because a LOT of people in our culture have been convinced it doesn't exist.

No joke: ADHD & trauma will tag team the sh*t out of you. ADHD kids are at higher risk of abuse & neglect, less likely to get the support they need-- & it's REAL hard to work a recovery plan w/ compromised executive functioning. It's super common-- & it's not your fault.

ADHD is about attentional dysregulation, not a straight up "deficit." Attentional HYPERfocus will ruin your life as handily as attention "deficit." ADHD is about not being able to put your focus where it needs to go, when it needs to go there.

DENIAL of ADHD and/or trauma is a FAR bigger, FAR more pervasive problem than people claiming they have ADHD or trauma who don't. This ableist fantasy that there are millions of people falsely claiming "ADHD" or "trauma" is ENORMOUSLY destructive.

ADHD is overwhelmingly under diagnosed & untreated in adults-- and often misdiagnosed as personality disorder.

"Forgive and forget?" Nah. Remember and recover.

Dr. Glenn Patrick Doyle Fuck forgiving .. heal

You working your recovery today is worth acknowledging & celebrating, whether it's Day One or Day One Thousand. I'm so f*cking proud of you.

Yes, going "no contact" w/ a family member or ending a well-established relationship is kind of "extreme"-- which should give an indication of how painful, dangerous, or soul-crushing the relationship had become, not how "impulsive" or "selfish" the person making the choice is.

The culture has many ways of asking trauma survivors, "okay, but what were you wearing?"-- many of which aren't obvious, but which leave us feeling ashamed & guilty anyway.

Hear me out: what if it's not your failure to "forgive" that's making certain relationships awkward & stressful-- what if it's their attitudes, beliefs, & behavior? What if "forgiveness" is not a realistic or reasonable response to how they act toward & around you?

For many survivors, our trauma conditioning becomes very evident in the way we talk to ourselves when we're sick or in pain. Us feeling weak or not functioning well really invites Trauma Brain to cross examine us about being "dramatic" or "faking it."

Post traumatic relationships often need more space, physically & emotionally, than many people may understand. It can be hard for partners of survivors to accept that this isn't personal-- nor is the need for many survivors to have an "escape route" if they need it.

When trauma survivors finally start feeling safe in relationships, we often start reconnecting to attachment needs & wants we'd dissociated or otherwise buried-- & that can be stressful. It's real important we meet those resurfaced needs w/ compassion, patience, & curiosity.

Most of the survivors I've worked w/ are not making a "choice" to communicate to their "parts" that they don't care about them-- they're playing out patterns of dismissiveness & self-neglect they've been taught & conditioned in. We learn it young & don't realize it's happening.

When we've been conditioned to believe we don't "deserve" basic emotional or physical safety, seeking to escape dangerous relationships or situations is going to feel "selfish." Tolerating that "in trouble" feeling is going to be one of our recurring hurdles in trauma recovery.

Don't just learn about trauma or psychology. Learn about hormones, neurotransmitters, time management, goal setting, meditation & other naturally/purposefully altered states of consciousness, nutrition, & exercise. Soak up info & perspectives like your life depends on it.

Many trauma survivors struggle w/ the reality that our relationship decisions don't have to begin & end w/ what is "safe"-- we are also get to consider what we want, what we're attracted to, & whether a partner's values, preferences, & goals are aligned w/ ours.

People who didn't grow up abused or neglected can absolutely develop CPTSD in adulthood through exposure to coercive control, medical trauma, or other traumatic stressors that unfold over time, entwine w/ their relationships, & are functionally inescapable. CPTSD is not "rare."