Most men look for tramp stamps like a guided missile looks for it's target.

Firstly, I am very secure with the fact I'm straight but what's so sickening about gays? I don't understand her logic on this...

How does one have a casual psychotic conversation?

The new Starbucks cups annoy me.

I'm the most attractive superhero this side of the universe. Your argument is invalid in any form you try presenting it.

Everyone get the hell out of the avengers mansion before War Machine and I just destroy it with everyone inside it.

#WhyRelationshipsDontLast it's because I'm still alive, what other explanation is there?

Referring to Hawkeye as Legolas was the highlight of the nerd universe, admit it.

I've decided that I'm having a last minute party at my mansion in Malibu. Since Loki is incarcerated, things should go smoothly.

Deadpool is over for a few drinks. Let's see how this night turns out.

It's 8:00 AM in Los Angeles and I have a hangover the size of Jupiter. HELLO HOLLYWOOD.

#HowToPissOffLoki Show him a photo of his parents... Oh, wait...

Weird Funny Inventions - epphany.com/site/post/11?m…

There should be a test that is required to take in order for people to use the Internet. It would help root out ignoramus individuals.

Fashion Inspired By Witches From American Horror Story: Coven - epphany.com/site/post/529?…

Lost three followers. Bitches be hatin' on the Stark.

Tips to Keep Your Skin Clear - epphany.com/site/post/398?…

It's been far to long, twitter.

Mary-Jane Watson is the Princess Peach of the Marvel Universe.

Is it legal to marry your reflection? nvm, I can just make it legal LOL.