They got lucky no other state closely rhymed with mansion.

In 2020, Oregon legalized cocaine for personal use and I’m still pissed they didn’t name the law “The Oregon Trail.”

How do I know the toothbrush was invented in Alabama? Because if it was invented anywhere else it would be called teethbrush.

Whataburger is just Burger King with cowboy boots on.

I’m upset by how accurate this is.

The goats!! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

💙💙💙

Arizona has beaches, the country’s largest economy, highest paid workers, and the most Michelin rated restaurants now?

Bro watched 8 mile the night before no doubt.

Sorry. I had to.

Third winter is here for all these other bozo states. #CFG

Signs all over LA to use public transit for earth day. Bitch what transit? Bird scooters?

Funny how New Yorkers are talking shit about California on their first warm day of the year. Y’all were quiet in February when your nuts were frozen on the L train.

New merch is out. Hop on that preorder before we sell out. caforevergoodbye.com

What does a Florida hurricane, a Kansas tornado and an Arkansas divorce have in common? Some poor redneck is gonna lose his trailer home.

Yes. Objectively the best place.

You can take Michigan while you’re at it.

Grabbing a drink tonight at Swallows Inn in downtown San Juan. If you’re in the OC area, come hang with your boy.

65 year old dude next to me on this plane is watching Elf. This is the happiness I’m striving for.

Jesus Christ is King! Turn to Him and experience grace only the Lord can give.