Damn, didn’t know Vegas and Miami are becoming their own countries in 2026

oh my fuck

one away from drugged up in cage or all the fun in the world succumb to sudden malaise open.spotify.com/track/12jk2vSa…

sometimes after I eat a whole bag of popcorn and lick all the salt out of the bowl like a horse I think about how not that long ago a cardiologist told me my heart was beautiful

Every person who ends up doing a criterion closet video does the same thing where they go “oh man oopy boopy and the curse of the desk, such an important film’ but it’s something nobody has ever heard of and only made $24 at the box office

yvan eht nioj open.spotify.com/track/5IlnXh8U…

Don’t believe the lies, his name isn’t even dicky. It’s just a nickname. His legal name is penis

hyundai tucson

dodge ram

What in the grand theft auto am I looking at

Uhhh how many spots did I pay for

Went on an adventure today

Do you guys remember joan rivers

Ask me how much money I just spent in warframe

Our ancestors fought for our independence so we could void warranties on vehicles from other countries

Hey now that it’s finally dark on the east coast: If you post firework videos on socials tonight I’m going to find out where you live, come to your house, and punch you directly in the mouth

Humidity should be against the law

open.spotify.com/track/1CXfq8G5…

somebody come wash this fucking red thing please I really don’t want to

When I was 18 I made the speedo in my cherokee stop working after it went past the largest available number