When politicians resort to blaming immigrants, you know they've run out of ideas.

Math rock drummers be like “... & a 1, 2. A 1, 2, 4, 7, 35, 8”

On the 6th of December I'll be releasing the German version of my Christmas song 'Weihnachten Wie Gewohnt'.. hope you will all enjoy 😊 facebook.com/events/5611436… David Christie Liam Poole JaN PuLSFoRD Jules🎋🧘🏼‍♀️🌴 🌵 adrianmillsdesign Neil Innes Lynda-Louise Michael Livesley

Loving every other pic on my TL being a ‘sponsored ad’ for some utter shit in the run up to xmas Instagram #lessads

Just had a barney with my wife coz I wanted to listen to I D L E S after dinner but my wife didn’t coz she has a ‘head cold’. Things got quite heated & I called her selfish. Not sure how to navigate the remainder of the evening... #answersonapostcardplease

As if this twat’s gone to A&E with a spot on her cheek that she’s too scared to pop herself?!?! Wasteman #24hoursinAandE

Emergency service vehicles sounding their sirens 🙄 like, we get it you do-gooders

A cold + a moustache ain’t the one. If I stray more than 10m from a box of tissues I look like one of The Twits

Official video of 'Weihnachten Wie Üblich' follow the link under the video to download. Hope you enjoy :) David Christie Lynda-Louise Liam Poole JaN PuLSFoRD girl in a gale @Luke_Littleboy @luke_deacon Producer_Chloe Lloyd Willis Stephen Foster youtu.be/LJ2GTyuvnKA

I instantly think of George Carlin whenever I hear someone say ‘near miss’

The Tiger Who Came To Tea is a story made up by the wife because she’s having an affair

My five-year-old just called me ‘a big pile of average’

Had a dream last night that Låpsley’s music was on the GSCE curriculum. I got an A*

Regretting eating a spicy ham & cheese toastie before swimming. I swear I left some jalapeño in the pool

This morning my 9 year old said he knows Santa isn’t real, which rocked my world because I didn’t

New tune Art Moon is out now! Music by me, artwork by Lochlan (10), song title by Arlo (6) - Head to Bandcamp to download

My new EP is out everywhere today Five songs for the summer Artwork by Ben Driver Bells on ‘Ours Is A Better Beach’ played by Amy SoapBox, original sample from ‘Garden City’ by The Decibel Kid