I’m not familiar with “leftover bacon”

this man just called me a maniac.. boy idk nothing about cars! WRONG BITCH!!!!

My non Spanish speaking ass watching bad bunny next February

i hate when teachers are like “if I make an exception for you, i’d have to make an exception for everyone.” do you fucking know what an exception means

My favorite part of my work day is when I grab my shit and leave

exactly

D3 and I have been saying 6-7 to Dionne for 2 weeks straight. Today, she’s back with her father so I waited til my phone was charged to 67% and sent a screenshot to her. I’ll report back shortly.

I know it’s not supposed to be funny but Meghan Trainor’s character getting thrown out that window sent meeeee 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

here's the problem with putting on a new season of Love Is Blind in the background--you KNOW there is mess...b/c Nick and Vanessa Lachey are chaos agents of Satan. and you wanna GET to the mess. but you gotta endure SO. MUCH. CRINGE first.

My mom coulda used this is ‘98 when her uncle spilled ALOT of gumbo in the back of her Isuzu.. It smelled like spoiled seafood for MONTHS after 😂😂😂

hot yesterday, tornado last night, cold today, pollen everywhere, & gas $3000

you relax for 15 minutes after work and next thing you know it’s 10pm😭

You can't keep postponing things just because you aren't ready. You really have to do it scared.

when i'm having fun on a Sunday and it reaches 6-7pm

I remember I saw a big ass box of condoms in an ex’s suitcase and my chest was cracked open.. But when I asked if he wanted to be in an open relationship he got offended af as if he wasn’t already fucking other people 😂😂 niggas ain’t shit boy

You can be the most beautiful woman with an awesome personality and ride for only ONE guy and he will still find away to fuck over you