Today I learned that aggressive baby goats have to wear horn noodles to avoid hurting each other

Wow. This is quite a photo.

Apologies to whoever stole the Apple AirPods from my car - they’re a bit waxy, so best clean them out. As for the golf clubs, their lie-angle is for a midget, so beware. And that stuff on the coat it dog jizz. Otherwise, enjoy.

Just to be clear for the thousandth time as I woke up to all this stuff sent my way on social media... my family is from Brooklyn, NOT Tampa, we do NOT own Man U. We can’t sell bc WE DON’T OWN IT!! You can’t be that good a fan of them if you think an NFL Insider owns your team

Van der Poel wint meteen bij zijn wederoptreden op de mountainbike

MORNING. Today is 16 years since Brian Harvey ran himself over after eating too many jacket potatoes. NEVER FORGET.

Amanda Holden left fuming after thousands of copies of her new covers album go to print bearing an unfortunate typo on her version of a David Bowie classic. “This is a monumental cock-up,” she raged

Ed Sheeran says he’s still shocked the Old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now because she’s dead

Jason Kenny has stunned them all! What a way to make British Olympic history with his seventh gold medal! 🥇🥇🥇🥇🥇🥇🥇 #Tokyo2020 #Olympics #bbcolympics x.com/BBCSport/statu…

Seb saying pretty much the same thing I said last night. Seb is a smart man. He gets it. Autosport

Cameron; king of factual dead pan comedy.

My dog Nelly has a best dog friend called Larry. Larry has an owner called Tom who is my friend. The young dogs swim together in an idyllic spot of the river Wensum every morning. They bring back sticks to us in exchange for treats. It was all very idyllic until this happened...

Ronde 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

‘HE WHO HATH NOT A UTERUS SHOULD SHUT THE FUCKETH UP’ - Fallopians 13:13 #AbortionRightsAreHumanRights #RoeVsWade

Can't wait to see who comes out and resigns next. It's like the weirdest Royal Rumble ever. Want to hear the sound of glass smashing then Stone Cold walking out and stunning the entire front bench

I’m Eddie f***ing Pepperell.

these giggs messages are fantastic, think this tops the lot though…

Watch any of his talk show appearances and you’ll agree that Oliver was always a bit of a prat, but I’ve always admired the way he finally called it a day 🍻🥃

Ich liebe alles hieran 🥹2,4 km vor dem Ziel nimmt Geraint Thomas seinen alten Freund und ehemaligen Teamkollegen Mark Cavendish samt dessen Sprintanfahrer ans Hinterrad und bereit den Sprint vor. Cavendish gewinnt im Anschluss - den letzten Giro-Sprint seiner langen Karriere.

re Geraint Thomas leading out Mark Cavendish at the Giro today- great story - I remember after Thomas won the Tour in 2018, Cavendish wrote a column for the Telegraph in which he recalled a similar act of selflessness in stage 1 of that race