just tried to think of the opposite for rain forest and came up with “cold forest”

you ever just go to the beach stand in the waves and yell Poseidon do your worst

my new goal is 300 lbs by 2024

eating a bird out of a nest: wrong eating a bird out of an oven: right from where do we create such absurd societal norms

had such a good tweet on my mind this morning and now now my life is over

I want to see Georgia Okeeffe’s rendition of a bacon egg and cheese McGriddle

when an artist got just initials for a name do you say the letters out loud or do you just go with what the letters might spell

I just want to bury it in there get it deep lose my fucking mind - dog hiding a stick

for a second I thought beer was a soda

my dentist quoted 5000$ for Invisalign like I would say yippee to that shit , dog I’ll keep the gaps

love a good fast charger , 40% already ? damn baby I only wanted 10

I was staring blankly into a mirror thinking about what I wanted to eat then all of the sudden I said “mcchicken” out loud with a sense of childhood wonder

3 beers and I’m handicapped 4 beers and I’m a wizard

32oz cup loyalist if your buying your drink in a bag just phone it in

how many of your high school acquaintances have tried to crypto scam you this fall season

not having broccoli just pissed me off for real how do you make beef n broccoli without the star of the show #eatingmidtn

86 fennel Chef smoked it all

Hungry girls go nonverbal