If only I'd been in the Labour Party, at least I'd have a shot at leadership.

I'm a really nice guy. Honest. I do lots of photo ops with primary schoolkids & cancer charities & worthwhile stuff. I don't open food banks

If only Labour would accept that they're not socialists anymore then I could represent them and win them this seat.

@voomonster D.H.Campbell DAVID ARNOTT Brian Lawson GregorSharp pretty good. Once we get rid of your pesky human rights things'll be gr8

@voomonster DAVID ARNOTT but the UK Supreme Court has the power to strike down any Scots laws. I'm investing in razorwire for the camps. 🇬🇧

Met a bloody malingerer today. On DLA after 36 yrs as an engineer in Hawick factories. #lifestylechoice

@voomonster DAVID ARNOTT LOL not much use when we leave the EU first.

Going to persuade Dave to insist on a repeal of hunting laws in Scotland in exchange for more powers. That'll set the fox among the hounds.

"Shame on the people who have used the pretext of anti-terrorism to perpetrate abhorrent acts like this." facebook.com/david.taurus/p…

Ladies & Gentlemen, Boys & Girls of all ages. After a Summer of glad handing & buttering up the plebs I'm back.

In case you missed it I've got a new campaign leaflet out, completely free of Scottish Conservatives branding to avoid embarrassment....wait! WTF?

FFS @RuthDavidsonMSP ruined my campaign leaflet by mentioning Scottish Conservatives at least 3 times in her message. Fucking big gobbed Soutars

This week I'll be having surgeries in Kelso & Jedburgh. Welcome to everyone. Except scruffy oiks. That means almost everyone in Jethart.

Having a good giggle at Naughty nataliemcgarry's expense. Remember, it ain't a crime if you don't get caught. So says Erik Everlast. 🤘🏻

I've noticed some Nat supporter trying to shame me on FB. Doesn't he know I AM the Scottish Conservatives party.

Also noticed that people have said my expenses are much greater than Paul Wheelhouse🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🇺🇦🇪🇺 & others. I say is if you pay peanuts you get monkeys.

Like I said #peanuts #monkeys x.com/jedi_mummy/sta…

Westminster here I come! Nothing can stop me now, not even being a rape apologist & victim blamed.

I should really start pricing up property in London.