Last night I swerved to miss a spider web and hit a tree instead ahahaaa

Can't stand a fake ass bitch

It's 7:30 in the morning and I've already had a breakdown in the back of a BP parking lot, 100 miles from home without gas. Aha haaaaa

Not missing the opportunity to share this and possibly inform/help someone who might across this.

I can make you laugh sometimes

Whoever keeps making fake accounts of me, ya moms a hoe

When my man orders food that looks better than what I ordered and I want it

trying to fucking steer on Mario kart

Y'all I'm driving 30 minutes to come get a possum out of this bitch's trashcan. Don't say I never did anything for you 😂😂

How tf did we hit two deer in a DAY

It's easier to put a key in a door than put the door on the key 🤐

After a certain age being messy is a sign of misery.

This cold weather got my joints feeling like I'm damn near 70 years old

I just found nipple rings with bells on them and I'm going to be UNSTOPPABLE this Christmas with jingle tits

healing is so fucking frustrating.. it’s like you’re doing well, you’re forgiving, you’re letting shit go and you’re working on processing through it all then BOOM, traumatic shit enters your mind and you have to start all the way over processing those feelings & getting past it.

"That lobster is Dr. Phil" -Mckayla

I love you bitch Mckayla