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Today’s PSA: 👏🏼 PEOPLE WHO ONLY WORK PART-TIME ARE ALLOWED TO BE TIRED 👏🏼 Full-time jobs tend to be hard. But part-time jobs are capable of being hard as well. There is no one kind of hard.

I honest to God cannot remember the last time I was sick

🎉🤠500 follower Raffle time!🤠🎉 🌟Rules🌟 - You must like + rt this post! - You must be following me! 🌟Prize🌟: I will draw your OC on a date with one of these farmer men 👨‍🌾👨‍🌾 -Or- If you prefer I will draw your OC on their own! SFW only! 🌟❤Thank you and Good luck❤🌟

7 years clean from self-harm as of May 16 (blew right by me again 🤪). I like this self-improvement thing. I think I’m gonna do it some more. ✌🏼

Put a Mystery Shack in Disneyland. Then I pay myself a giant bonus & resign

Um wow why does Hollywood treat talented artists like shit 😑 #CreditDaveAlvarez

For fucks sake everyone get vaccinated

Anybody want these Muppets Haunted Mansion buttons? Will pick a random *follower* who retweets this by Halloween night!

If *Big Bird * can get vaccinated, so can you

Happy grad school admissions season ✌🏼 My top choice said no…

Tell me you’re a scammer without telling me you’re a scammer 🙄

Tips for men at the gym :) inspired by real events that I have personally experienced

Oddly comforting. I’m not even halfway there yet. I’ve only just started to be able to even *glance* at the hospital when I drive past it again.

🎵 BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I’M WALKING ON AIR 🎵

Holy cow, I’m still here?! Aaron Sparrow™ is okay, maybe? Come in, Aaron Sparrow™ is okay, maybe! #MyTwitterAnniversary

Why is Disney remaking its old cartoons as live-action movies when it could be remaking them as Muppet movies?

Freshman told his biology partner he’d pay her $20 if she ate the mouse skull they found in the owl pellet dissection. She did. Ever since then, freshmen at my high school can no longer dissect anything. My teacher told us she can still hear that crunch.

Why does “You’ve visited this page many times” feel like a personal attack