Literally sobbed watching the Grace and Frankie finale yesterday, emotions all over the place after the weekend 🙃

45 minutes into that Joker film everyone wanks over and I've never been so bored in my life

It's an outrage that Aberdeen Airport doesn't have a Pret

My idea of heaven is me just dancing to Lady Gaga performing Replay on repeat for eternity. My idea of hell is watching my snapchats back the next day on repeat.

There's 2 kinds of people in this world, the people who will walk 3 minutes down the road to buy a bag of ice for £1 and those of us who'll pay £7.65 to have someone cycle over from 3 miles across town to drop it off. Personally don't believe in people who make it themselves

me buying something from M&S

MP explains how mini-budget & trickle down economics is like “watering a garden. Selectively”

I hope Liz Truss will now apologise to the school she said overlooked her potential

Of course my washing machine jumps up it's own ass when I'm looking at buying a new TV 😫

My column on the stories Matt Hancock tells himself - and his party colleagues only NOW discovering the backbone to criticise him theguardian.com/commentisfree/…

Away for two nights but I have managed to squeeze 4 coats into my bag

Me leaving the co op with a bottle of wine after telling everyone on Facebook that I’m doing dry January

HIGNFY producers hoping BBC don’t find out that Ian Hislop also edits a satirical magazine occasionally critical of government policy.

Is it normal that I have a playlist on my phone of funeral songs that are pre-approved in case I drop dead tomorrow? Personally I think it’s sensible because I wouldn’t want to embarrass myself

How does my parents’ house not have a single bottle of face wash? Like what happened to me that made me so eager to wash my face twice daily when all these minks don’t do it at all? It seems mad that I am required to bring face wash with me when visiting.

Honestly what a nightmare I’m having trying to get tickets for ABBA Voyage this morning

Here’s a video produced by “Led by Donkeys” out of the U.K. that puts down the timeline of how Musk used X to get Donald Trump elected. I would save it because I don’t think it will be up for long.

Kamala Harris told us exactly what was going to happen.

Jon Sopel Calling American sparking wines ‘Champagne’.