PHILOSOPHER: In short, love to the human being is neither something prescribed by destiny, nor something spontaneously generated. We do not 'fall' in love./n/nYOUTH: Then, what is it?/n/nPHILOSOPHER: It is something we build. Love that is just 'falling', anyone can do.

PHILOSOPHER: The thing is, we receive no education whatsoever on the task to be accomplished by two people. YOUTH: And that task to be accomplished by two people is. . . PHILOSOPHER: The love that Adler speaks of.

PHILOSOPHER: It is by pursuing 'my happiness' that we build division of labour relationships and by pursuing 'your happiness' that we build friend relationships.

PHILOSOPHER: When one knows real love, the subject of life changes from 'me' to 'us'. It allows one to live by completely new guidelines that are of neither self-interest nor other-interest.

PHILOSOPHER: Love is a task accomplished by two people. Through love, two people accomplish a happy life. Then, why does love connect to happiness? In a word, it is because love is liberation from 'me'.

PHILOSOPHER: One has to make peace with the world and come to the understanding that one is a part of the world.

PHILOSOPHER: We have to get past our obstinate self-centredness and stop trying to be the centre of the world. One has to break away from 'me'. One has to break away from one's pampered childhood lifestyle.

PHILOSOPHER: To know love and to change the subject of life to 'us'. This is a new start to life. The 'us' that began as just two people will eventually broaden in scope to the entire community and the entire human race.

YOUTH: We become adults by loving? PHILOSOPHER: Yes. Love is self-reliance. It is to become an adult. That is why love is difficult.

PHILOSOPHER: Love and courage are closely connected.

PHILOSOPHER: One separates the tasks. Loving is your task. But how will the other person respond to your love? That is the other person's task and is not something you can control. What you can do is separate the tasks, and just love first, from yourself. That is all.

There is no destined one.

PHILOSOPHER: Whether in love, or in life in general, Adler does not accept the existence of a destined one of any kind.

PHILOSOPHER: Why do many people seek a destined one in love? Why do we entertain romantic illusions of our marriage partners? The reason, Adler concludes, is 'To eliminate all the candidates.'

PHILOSOPHER: So, what does a person do when they lose the courage to embark on a relationship? They cling to fantasies of a destined one.

PHILOSOPHER: There is no destined one or anything of the sort for us, and one must not wait for such a person to appear. Nothing will change by having waited.

PHILOSOPHER: There is one thing that you should do. Take the hand of the person beside you, and try to do the best dance that you can possibly do in that moment. Your destiny will start from there.

PHILOSOPHER: Love is all. The person who lives wanting an easy life or looking for the easy way may find fleeting pleasures, but they will not be able to grasp real happiness. It is only by loving another person that we are liberated from self-centredness.

PHILOSOPHER: Well, I cannot enter any further into your tasks. But if you were to ask my advice, I would probably say something like this: 'Love, be self-reliant and choose life.' YOUTH: Love, be self-reliant and choose life!

PHILOSOPHER: One devotes one's ceaseless efforts so that when the day of parting comes, one will be able to be satisfied that 'Meeting this person, and passing the time together with this person, was not a mistake.'