the new bruno mars and sexyy red song actually just ruined my evening

raising a baby with no village is hard and I am tired !!!

this may be controversial but machine washable rugs are terrible, they don’t vacuum well and the big ones rarely fit in an average size washing machine or have enough space to actually get clean

The local car dealership coming to my house and changing my oil for free is the greatest luxury I’ve ever known

I hope everyone enjoyed their super bowl snacks because I bit into a bbq weenie with a shard of GLASS sticking out of it and it stabbed me in the gums

I love facebook marketplace bc someone is selling red bull for $3 and someone else is selling a personal jet for $1.3m

why’d I just spend an hour peeling and shredding vegetables and mixing them into beef for homemade meatballs for my daughter just for her to take a bite and make this face 🥴

why do chevy spark owners drive like that

I am so tired of people acting like giving up your career and most aspects of your life to be a mother is just a luxury and not a huge sacrifice!! I LOVE being a mom but let’s not pretend I didn’t give up just about everything to do that 🙃

nobody warned me that being a mom meant taking care of everyone all the time, I am so drained 🫠

the only way you can really know you got a good deal on a car at a dealership is if the salesman is mildly irritated with you by the time you leave

there’s a mom in a Facebook group I’m in saying she wants to leave her husband and 4 children just to…start over? she is about to leave 4 kids (ages 1-12) with lifelong abandonment issues because she wants a fresh start. Some moms are literally garbage people

apple’s new “send later” feature for imessage is a lifesaver bc I’m a mom now and that means I finally get a moment to text back clients and friends after 10pm every day but now I just schedule them all for the next morning, 10/10!

I’m having a strawberry themed first birthday party for my daughter tomorrow and today an animal ate every last strawberry off of the strawberry plant I’ve been growing for months. who does that

where did you get this photo of my husband at work

today my kid ate a dead spider she found on the floor and then 20 minutes later refused to even TOUCH the freshly sliced banana I served her like it was some kind of insult

I convinced my sister in law to go to a grimy bar with me and we were offered drugs in under 10 minutes so basically she’s never taking my recommendations again

I bought a 12 pack of Barq’s root beer today and the cashier was like “I just tried that stuff for the first time the other day, it’s amazing!” and then I had the honor of telling him that root beer floats exist too

the medal for living in Florida for a long time is just having a theme park connection for every Orlando theme park so you never have to pay admission

Love island is entertaining and all but the way everyone acts like their friend being sent home means they’re being shot execution style in the parking lot is crazyyyy