Omg PETA 😭

i wish i got drunk as fast as people in tv shows

sucks that all the little coffees I buy cost money; they should be free because I need them, like medicine

why does cooking peppers & onions make me feel like i’m an adult

what are some fun beginner tax evasion schemes for someone getting into fraud

by age 25 you should be 36

i always eat a taco w the same hand. tried holding it the other way & lost all motor function

WELL WHO YELLS AT PEOPLE

Can we normalize saying we love a book without remembering anything about it.

Bad Bunny with the most yards gained as of now

does anyone make weighted blankets in colors other than mental illness gray

hey if you ever need me i’m only 7 unread texts & a missed call away

and for the lady, perhaps an entire week of existing without any responsibilities

when is the appropriate age to turn auto capitalization back on

i'll have you all know that i've read all my text messages. ppl might not be getting a response, but i've read them

why is it easier to cross your legs one way & not the other

i feel like i’m playing it pretty 50/50 even on totally keeping it cool vs absolutely saying the wrong thing

this is going to be my new fun fact tomorrow at work

i’m unmedicated. all my thoughts are organic and free range

I turned my auto-capitalization on