They’re doing doing pussy analytics and I’m one of the old assholes in moneyball who’s like look pal I know good pussy when I see it

kitten your pussy analytics came back and … im sorry … but we’re going to have to let you go .

This just might be the greatest Invincible VS tweet of all time.

“Marijuana affects your memory” that’s fine. Better even

You can stop tagging the FBI under this. They've seen it, they just can't afford to drive over here now.

you could make a 4 hour long compilation with all the times trisha paytas has been racist, lgbtphobic, ableist, zionist or just being a disgusting human being in general and yet nobody gives a shit lol peak white influencer privilege

*reading about Icarus but stopping 2/3 through* Wow. He really did it. He flew super close to the sun with no consequences

you can tell white people genuinely believe they deserve to live

Guy with no object permanence having sex: 😏😨😮‍💨😨😮‍💨😨😮‍💨😨

yall couldn't find a better place to put him? 😭

the deep

That guy has a logic fetish. He can't stop coming to conclusions.

I am genuinely impressed by The Walt Disney Company’s accomplishment of making me not care about Star Wars any more

"i have a breeding kink" IT'S A FACTORY SETTING IT COMES FREE WITH YOUR BIOLOGICAL IMPERATIVE!!!

Those dweebs should have been on the frontlines of the Star War poking every injured soldiers with their glowing healing fingers. The cowards. The absolute cowards.

[The most 20-25 minutes away guy you have ever heard in your entire life] yeah, i'm about 12 minutes away.

I have NEVER understood the cognitive dissonance between white people en masse in America celebrating Cinco de Mayo while simultaneously cheering on the murders and state kidnappings of Latino people. It's chilling to me. Always has been.