Listening to pundits debating whether there will be college ball this year. There’s no chance, it’s a wrap for 2020.

Kid Cudi & Eminem - The Adventures of Moon Man and Slim Shady [Audio] youtu.be/PydazfrZiwI via YouTube

Okay Snapple

My body is a temple. It just needs some renovations.

I can’t believe there’s a dating website called “Plenty of Fish” where people create profiles to try to attract different fish to take out on a date.

Canadians have a life expectancy 4 years longer than Americans, weed is legal, they have the most clean water in the world, free health care, highest college grad rate, 7 million acres of beautiful protected wildlife and the police don’t murder people all the time. I’m just sayin

Might fuck around and try to illegally cross the border to the north and try to build a better life for myself.

Toronto won’t let the Blue Jays play in their home stadium because of the dangers of covid-19. But don’t worry, here in the states, money supersedes human life so c’mon over to NY and spread it around here Blue Jays! We’re shamelessly chasing profits and open for business! USA!

If you don’t know who Big Pun is you’re either too young or too old to fuck w me.

Fuck Murphy and his bitch ass law.

Just when you thought 2020 couldn’t get worse, Netflix releases a Rob Schneider stand up special.

My man, Donald J. Trump ...

This is what voter suppression looks like.

white ppl love to see a line forming behind them and being like “wow we got here at the perfect time”

I literally did three full yawns while my boss was telling me something and he didn’t notice at all. And I thought the masks had no other benefits other than health.

I feel like they just made Osama Bin Laden up and he was never even a real person. It was like Sacha Baron Cohen all along.

Hamburger Helper got real stingy with the noodles. They think I didn’t notice, but I noticed.

It doesn’t matter how nice the hotel room is, every dark stain was from a murder.