I think the simulation needs a reboot

These long goodbyes from Twitter by these famous people are hilarious

he censored it im in tears

Jake Paul does have one advantage, aside from 30 years of youth.. his face is very punchable.

You fucking suck at this Netflix

Hey netflix⁷. Stop sucking. Sincerely, Humanity

Dear netflix⁷, most of us watching are gen x kids and we in our mid 40s now and it’s past our bedtime, could you please get this shit going or we out bro!

On November 15, 1995, two days into a federal government shutdown, President Bill Clinton began a sexual relationship with then-White House intern Monica Lewinsky

12 just said "of all the things that didn't happen the most, this is it"

The old people want to go to bed, Netflix.

I'M BACK BITCHES!!!!

I hurt LEON fee fees n he suspended me for a week n a day. Fuck him.

Y'all still have Disneyland don't be greedy.

fuck me? nah…fuck you.

Listen, no one likes Ohio.

Las Vegas strip clubs are empty (as they have been for several days), dancers are losing money (after house fees and tip-ours), per well-placed sources.

Hi guys, have a good night n sweet dreams. Take your meds. Hydrate. Eat something. Self-care.

Yer mum

Hey AshTags LivesOnAFarmNow 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈 you try those gluten free Oreos? Also when you gonna help me scare off everyone on butterflybluethingy.

It’s earthquake time, bitch